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| Mass shooting in Plymouth sent shockwaves (Image: BBC) |
It's taken me a while to reflect on what happened in Plymouth back in August. This isn't just because of my busier than normal work and life schedule, but it's also because I needed to find the right words to say. I know, however, as a responsible male, I needed to say something, as the more I read about the terrifying event on that particular evening, the more compelled I feel to try and suggest ways to actually stop more of these avoidable situations from happening.
The evening of 12th August 2021 started like any other day in Keyham, located in the beautiful city of Plymouth in Devon; residents coming back from work, cooking their dinner, taking their dogs for a walk. But as the sun set, the quiet area witnessed a bloodshed. 22-year-old Jake Davison had a row with his mother in their home. It intensified to the point that Davison took a gun and shot her to her death. He then ran out of his house and shot dead four others and wounding a number of others. Among the dead was a three year old girl who, with her father (who also died at the scene) were just walking their dog. Davison then turned the gun on himself. This turned out to be the biggest mass shooting in the UK since 2010, sending shockwaves across the nation.
On paper, the evening was a complete freak show. A young man, who would've had a decent life ahead of him, felt compelled to end it in a flash. What could possess him to do such a thing? Investigators found the answer - in simple terms, he was angry. He couldn't find a girlfriend so he turned on his mother who he pointed the blame towards, as well as trying to find anyone he could find to also be a victim in this horror show.
I want to put aside Davison's personal limitations as the media were keen to pin down the fact that he had a reported diagnosis of autism and ADHD. For me, this is irrelevant to the fact that he couldn't get a girlfriend, or the fact - which I want to explore further - that he had created a YouTube channel where he and other young men in his situation could rant about why it's the girls' fault they're single.
Sadly, this anti-female sentiment is growing by the day. These young men go by the name of 'incel' - short for 'involuntarily celibate' - reports suggest that as many as 10,000 young men in the UK are part of this so-called community. And even more tragically, these isolated cases are increasing. In recent years, in the United States and Canada, these cases are high profile due to the shocking nature of them; namely the Sandy Hook shooting in 2012, the Charleston shooting in 2015 and the Toronto van attack in 2018. The nature of these crimes, as well as the profile of the accused, mirrors that of Davison's; namely their physical profile and personal circumstances. The victims don't necessarily need to be women, but the victims would appear as if they're in content relationships that the culprit craves.
I take their predicament both seriously and personally, as a young and hopelessly single man. Women are the last people to blame. To be honest, nobody should be blamed. We need to find a way to ensure that young men shouldn't feel that if they don't find a girlfriend by a certain age that they're total failures. The figures show that the pressure is increasingly off - there are fewer teenage pregnancies, sexual intimacy is down too.
With this in mind, messaging is hugely important and should be taught to any teenager boy approaching the age of 16; both at home and school. Messages such as; there's no pressure. If a woman isn't interested in you, it means that woman isn't right for you. It may sound slushy, naïve and cliched, but the mutual 'one' is out there for all of us seeking it, somewhere - and it doesn't matter whether you're young or old to find them. Life isn't always like what we see in film or TV. Adult content does not truly reflect typical intimate and committed relationships. We all have different life paths, different destinies. Perhaps I've taken these messages a little too far and one day, I will stop buying a cup of orange juice in the hope I'd accidently spill it over Julia Roberts in the middle of the street, just like Hugh Grant did in Notting Hill.
Joking aside, it's vitally important these anti-women groups are combatted and that the young men part of them are given a divine intervention; a dose of reality, improve their self-confidence and perspective, and how by being natural, they will find a girlfriend, and treat her right. Social media channels can take more robust action by taking these groups down quickly, and they should work with local authorities and government figures to identify the 'incel' individuals and offer them support. Prevention is the cure. We don't want any more cases where women suffer as a consequence of a man who feel the opposite sex must be punished for not giving them attention. This message is particularly poignant now, if the cases of Sarah Everard and Sabina Nessa are anything to come by.
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